and the countdown begins

Actually, the countdown has been on for awhile... I am ready to kiss 2009 goodbye (that is the only thing i'm going to be kissing tonight) and I am ready to see what 2010 has in store. This has most definetly been a year of ups and downs, alot of downs. But I must say I have grown in many many ways. I have become humble, happy with little, and confidence in myself and my future looking better. I have a job, a loving family, wonderfully amazing friends (no matter the distance) and that is really all you need. Yes I am cutting it way close on costs, but I am making it work, and know it won't be like this forever, and because of that I can not wait. I have learned more about myself, dating wise, it was a love hate thing... ending with admitting the doubts I had before, realizing no matter how much I want something to work and want someone to love me (in that way, I know I have plenty of people that love me) I can only do so much, and in the end, denying and ignoring cracks, does only more damage to myself. I have learned that I really can not make everyone happy, and I need to be ok with that. I am going to have to tell people things directly and know that they are not going to be happy with what I am saying. I have admired those around me with the strength to be blunt and honest... It is something I lack and am going to be working on this next year.

I have graduated college, love and lost again, moved to new places, trusted that life has a path for me and it is out of my control, I just have to trust my gut and go with it, its there for a reason.

Cheers to 2010, Cheers to surviving 2009, and Cheers to friends, family, love, peace, and an optimistic future.