very very cute dresses....

wonder what it would be to ship to California.....

www.motelrocks.com

also, i want to go shoe shopping...i think a good sexy pair of shoes could do me well....

 and have decided I need a good closet next time I move and it would fix a lot of my problems... sometimes I just want to be a little kid and play dress-up, that is hard to do with a closet the size of a pea and a room like a pea pod.... 

why haven't i had a blog for college

Of all the times to not keep an account of my life, why did I choose college, of all times, I should have recorded everything going on, the ups and downs, the excitement, the meeting of the best people to enter my life. The accounts of anger and joy.... oh well I suppose, from here on out, we will be speaking of what is happening... 

 

First thoughts of the day... "Wow I slept through the whole night, god it really is already 5:30, at least I don't have to wake up til 7:30 tomorrow morning, He really wanted someone close by, and found it, time to try and forget that and enjoy my day and realize all the love around me." 

Jealous - its not a word I use often, and for the most part I am not a jealous person, I have what I have because I earn it, yes I wish life was easier, doesn't everyone wish things were handed to them, but that makes me a better more understanding person of this world. But when it comes to relationships I get jealous of others that have ones that work so well, and I get jealous of how others can somehow just seperate themselves from someone they cared so much about, and I am jealous that I have yet to be in a solid relationship for any substantial amount of time. But I do know that this is the time in our lives that if you do date anyone for any length of time, it is something more serious usually. 

I don't know if I am just letting societies pressure get to me, the mass amount of change of last names on facebook of people I went to high school with, or the number of children people my age have. Is it that? or am I just impatient. Are what I see as "flaws" of attachment and  trust flaws, or will they truely pay off in the end. Is being nice to ex's and wishing them the best, when really you want them to realize you were the better one, and they messed up, and that you are worthe it the right thing to do. Or do you just tell them you hate the idea of them dating someone else.... 

ugh, maybe ralph waldo emerson was right, and I just need to go meet God out in nature and then be self reliant and I will be eternally happy... haha. 

Why am I such an optimist....

ugh sickness...

So went to the dr again on monday, finally got to see the dr i saw for pneumonia in february, and found out that there is still some left in me.... 3 months of being sick is enough, I want to be healthy before much longer, I am graduating in a month and a few weeks... and I want to enjoy the time I have out and about with people I might not ever live near again. I am trying to take as best care as I can without missing class and work... involves a lot of sleep and making sure I eat healthy.

On other notes found out the recent Ex is now seeing someone, I know I take longer to get over people then they tend to to get over me... but at the same time I can't help but feel like my life is on repeat... I am so glad though that my future as far as work in the following months, is not in my hands, at this point, I don't know what I want, or where I should be going, and simply have figured out what I will do based on what I am delt.... 

Need to start working on a formal outfit.... maybe some new shoes? I need another pair of shoes, haha, seriously though, I need something fun, that makes me feel amazing, shoes have that ability when nothing else or no one else can.... 

On a side note, my literature class is forcing me to read a lot of old "modern" literature, one of which is Benjamin Franklin. In reading his work I have found a somewhat settling thought in the fact that I am not the only crazy systematic thinker out there that is trying to better society from making myself a better person. Although Franklin is highly quotable, his writing it text and full summary takes on another full meaning. 

Also for the first time someone has inspired me to really actually consider checking out another "religious" view. I have definitely distanced myself from the religion I was brought up in, I agree with some, and disagree with others.... which I am sure is a battle of all people religious or not. However Franklin speaks about this type of battle that reaches out to me in one way or another. Once I have enough energy and time to look into such things, it will probably be on my blog.

love this

I also... absolutely love this dress... need to figure out how to replicate it on a smaller budget...

amazing earrings

So a lost friend of mine  back up with these wonderful and affordable earrings, i love them... getting a few pairs, but ever couple days she has new designed up, makes me want to get more!

http://beatnikzbizaar.wordpress.com

                                                        On a side note, i can not wait to get to a larger more diverse (in population, and personality) with thrift stores that haven't been run over one to many times, and have treasures to be found. I always think i just have no luck here, but then I go elsewhere and find so many things it's insane... 

School is finally starting to feel managable, its about time, it is week 4 after all... 6 weeks and I should have a degree.... 6 freakin' weeks, and a job... holy moly..... 

off to senior project

hello

Hello and welcome, 

    I haven't blogged in a few years, and I suppose it is becoming "trendy" to blog now. I am interested to have a "homepage" because I want to be able to watch other blogs, as well as the fact that I am at a pivotal place in life, getting ready to start a career path, which we will see if that takes me north or south, and what adventures that lay ahead of me. 

  That is all for now, as I am sure over the days and weeks that are ahead I will begin to form and shape this blog to become a very accurate representation of me, without hardly trying. 

   Cheers for now, 

       me