A better me

Ok, so I have slacked off. Not that I am a terrible person (I like to think I am better than average). However, there is always room for improvement, right? Maybe I am overly critical, but if I am, we'll it will only produce better results, in turn, a better me. 

Kristopher has been busy with school, and is very focused, driven, decisive. 

I, on the other hand, although busy with work, lack a full vision direction on where I want my life to go in all aspects (again this could also be perception - since most people think other people have things together, when most people may not - I don't really want to be part of the most people), am indecisive. I am self driven most of the time, but have lacked the support I think I have grown a bit accustom to where my self motivation lacks. 

Kristopher will always be there, if I say support, support he will, in what ever way I want, weather that is beside me, as a bystander cheering on, silently, or in my face. Which is amazing and more than I can ask for. What I need though, is my full self motivation back. 

I don't know where it went. But I am on a mission to get it back. I know it's a puzzle and there are a few pieces to it. 

1. Health - exercise. I love to run, and my mind needs that longer cardio workout to breathe as much as my lungs and heart need it. Road block = humidity sucks. This as resulted in a complete absence of exercise. Kristopher is helping, patiently trying different tactics ( bless his soul) from reminding me I should, to asking if I did, to asking when we can do it together (running that is). I do have a half marathon scheduled in January, and tried looking for one sooner - but, because of the weather here, they aren't done until Winter practically. I am trying to have balance too, work towards toned muscle, long, lean mass. Today's attempt included a Hulu plus workout.... It burned many muscle groups, so ill take it. 

  Sub category 1.1 food. I pack kristopher his lunch each day (love language - acts of service {next post on my current read and discoveries }) but really struggle to pack mine as well, or as balanced. So in an effort to eat better, spend less money on me, and be happier over all (because I think the three are linked) I am going to start packing my week of lunches all at once. Planning the weeks dinners has worked out well for the least few months, so I think this may work well. Plus I don't mind eating the same thing a few days in a row. 

2. Grad school. It's official - I begin at the end of August, the 29th to be exact. The schedule looks dauntingly long, but I know it's just about getting started and blinking and ill be nearly done. I have always been one to want to continue learning, life long learning. This degree (or dual degree rather) I think will help me feel like I am exercising my mind, and overall happier (although I know is going to be stressful at times too)

3. Reading. Obviously grad school will supply ample amounts of reading, but there's a difference between school reading, work reading, and enjoyment reading. Need to get back to doing more enjoyment reading... Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated.

4.time balance. Kristopher and I are getting better at this. Between our varying schedules daily as well as weekly, we are getting the hang of it most of the time. A huge key has been getting up when he gets up. 4:45am. Now some days I do go back to sleep for a bit, but most days I don't. This helps us go to bed at the same time too, which, when you don't have tons of time together, is more meaningful. And we have started to have more down time right before bed, making time to read and mellow out. I sleep fine, but Kristopher has always had a rough time getting good sleep. I am hoping this helps.

Ok enough ranting for one day. I do fell like I am an old person talking about all this silly-ness. However it's my place to write, and I know reviewing and documenting progress and plans does help achieve. There are other parts to the puzzle, finance planning, career goals, life long goals, relationship development. All which are making progress in the right directions, which I think are all keys to this happiness puzzle.